Week 2 of posts to inspire you in your leadership journey and through the week.
Rudyard Kipling, IF
As I challenge myself to make writing my daily practice (8 days and counting) I’m exploring the deeper realms of the topics close to my heart. One such topic is that of working mums. I’ve grown tired of the glowing toilet paper ad. mums who have it ‘all together’.
Life isn’t like that.
So, I’ve been writing about what it’s really like to juggle work and life here and loving the feedback from relieved mums who had previously thought they were the ‘only one’ who felt like that / did that / missed that…
Why DON’T we speak honestly and frankly about life’s challenges? Why do we have to gloss it all over for fear of being judged as not good enough, not smart enough, not together enough, not strong enough?
My friend Sue provided me with some wisdom;
“what other people think of me is none of my business” (I don’t know where Sue got it from, but Sue is my reference point)
How can we ever authentically lead when we are always looking over our shoulder to check that the ‘followers’ are nodding in agreement.
I don’t believe that good leaders always please the masses. Do you?
Which brings me to the second question about leadership for you. What is your leadership style? I don’t care about textbook versions here. I’m asking you… who are you as a leader? what do you stand for? what do you care about? How do you do your leadership dance? (let me know on our Facebook page)
When I ask people what matters most to them more often than not (unless it’s a teenager or someone that’s had a few drinks) they’ll tell me it’s ‘family’.
What matters most to you? Think of your top 5 things. The 5 things you simply couldn’t do without. Now, think about how you’ll actively address and honour each of those things in your life this week. What will you do? When?
I was really challenged this week with my ‘what matters’. Although I am very in tune with the fact that ‘family’ is on the top of my own ‘what matters’ list with a household of teen/tweens, a house move and various other challenges I had a good old fashioned melt-down.
As the lady who bangs on about ‘what matters’ I have an expectation of myself to always know how to honour the things that matter most to me. WRONG! And it was just that expectation that brought it all undone (refer to the last heading). However, knowing my ‘what matters’ also brought me back online and enabled me to bring my focus back to the reality of those things the are so important to me.
What matters most to you? What will you do to honour that this week (yeah, I know I already asked that).
In recent years I haven’t been a massive fan of team sports. However, this year has really brought about massive and really rewarding change in this realm. If you live in regional Australia (as I do) you’ll know that team sports are one of the building blocks of community spirit. (I’ve tried to create change around that but that’s another story, just go with what works I say these days).
When my son wanted to play NRL I eye rolled, complained, cringed and was a general pain in the rear for at least the first two seasons. But then I started to notice something. I noticed the community that had wrapped around him. I noticed him experiencing camaraderie and a close knit group of boys his age, and supportive male mentors.
I’m still not yahooing from the sidelines, but at least I now know the right team to sit with and I have a massive appreciation for what the game is giving my son.
More recently I joined a rollerderby team in a nearby community and find that I’m starting to experience a similar sense of belonging. The team has the most welcoming and embracing spirit and I must say I was more than pleased to say hi to a fellow rollerderby person as I walked through the town yesterday.
I’ve already mentioned my mum meltdown this week. My other enormous challenge was integrating exercise into a week that had me tightly wedged between client timeframes and kid needs.
I need to exercise, without it I just don’t think clearly. In fact, it’s beyond not thinking clearly. Truth is without exercise I’m a walking time bomb just waiting to explode a projectile vomit of negative and critical thoughts upon my otherwise optimistic mindset. Exercise makes me feel good. Between the endorphins, the fresh air and the satisfaction of actually doing it, I need it. Knowing that should be enough to PEN it into my diary. But for some illogical reason it’s always the first thing to go. (my self-destruct button if you like).
So this week I stole a few moments for exercise. a walk with Sue, 20mins at the gym and some incidental exercise walking to the post box, shop and so on. Still, not enough. This week I commit to more. How about you? How are you looking after your health this week?
A pocket of gold I’ve found this week is this phone number (if you’re in NSW, Australia)
Parent helpline 1300 130 052 Don’t be too proud to use it.
My theme for the week gone was flow and acceptance
This week the flow in the workplace has really taken form. A good spring clean in the office also helped that one out. It’s exciting to see the pieces fall into place and acceptance was a very integral part in that happening. Accepting that I cannot work with everyone (nor should I), accepting that delegating is not only possible but essential.
I have the opportunity to learn this on a deeper level on the home front. One step at a time.
I have two online challenges on the go at the moment. Find My Mojo designed to re-align people to their inner magic and August Adventures, a month of giving something that isn’t serving you well up.
Find my mojo: This week our Find My Mojo challenge will draw to a close. It’s been wonderful to take the time to dig into our inner practices. Doing the challenge again soon will keep you posted.
August adventures: 37 of us have joined online to give up something for the month of August. 9 alcohol free days later I’ve navigated friends dropping over with a bottle of wine, some excellent specials and even discovering a 15 year old bottle of red in my unpacking (I decided it would probably taste like vinegar). I’m doing it ! And not only does my mind feel incredibly clear I feel really good about my willpower.
Have a great week, stay in touch.
PS what does this post have to do with 20 flying pigs? It’s a simple note to myself about anything being possible, even working from home and that being OK. It’s about writing for pleasure and bringing even more joy to work. Finally it’s about exploring beyond what is possible, challenging my (and your) beliefs and uniting change.